Blog 20: Group Rhetorical Analysis of Girl Culture

http://www.pdpics.com/photo/2405-diet-apple-measure-tape-waist/

Link to group outline:
https://docs.google.com/a/email.arizona.edu/document/d/1oVtNoZV3bfwEOGPEqAeSxfFyJv-2PUHu-D_Vd6LkBbc/edit?usp=sharing

Paragraph(s):

The idea of makeovers have appealed to humans especially females throughout history. This traditionally referred to makeup and lipstick, but as the importance of the body becomes more evident, females who do not fit the slim look are under pressure to lose the excess weight. As a result, obese girls find themselves at a disadvantage in today’s society. Greenfield captures this belief in her photos of girls at a weight-loss camp in the Catskills. One of her photos show girls waiting in line to be weighed and measured for their last day of camp. The girl up front is having her breast line measured. Those behind her/in line stare nervously at her, none of them smiling. Perhaps they are wondering if she lost enough weight or maybe if they themselves have lost enough weight. These overweight girls are not content with their own bodies. Some parents are willing to spend money to make their children thin. Exercise/weight-loss is the new mode of makeover. No amount of lipstick or blemish could hide a large body. Greenfield provides a window in which both her male and female audiences can see the lives of these insecure, overweight females must endure and the steps they and/or their parents take to ensure that their bodies conform with the slim look or else these fat girls will become social outcasts.


Lauren Greenfield’s photos of adolescent, fat girls may disconcert her audience more than the pictures of females engaged in sexual horseplay. It is normal for girls to develop more fat tissues during puberty since their bodies are changing. An society that values thin builds provides little reassurance to these developing females. If thin is attractive, then fat must be ugly. Girls no longer have much room to adjust to their new bodies. Greenfield’s up close, biting, yet pitiful photos of chubby girls reinforces this view. She provides two portrait style photos of two obese girls at the same weight-loss camp, but this time, only the girl’s face is shown and not their full bodies which are left out for a reason. The audience may not want to look at their bodies. The same embarrassment these girls feel in the photo with their rosy cheeks and unhappy looks is also experienced by the audience. Girl culture polarizes human perspectives like Greenfield’s journal as a whole. There are the flamboyant, gaudy girls with the sexy bodies and there are the plain, down-to-earth, overweight females. Every girl starts out the same, as a baby, but the true test comes when puberty strikes. Humans value females who can resist this change and keep their thin bodies while those who struggle at that task also struggle in society.

Reflection:
Through outlining Brumberg's essay and trying to re-write it, I learned how to better write an analysis for visual media. An analysis seems to include inferences mixed in with prior knowledge, patterns seen in the photos, and covers ethos/pathos/logos without directly stating them. I noticed that Brumberg tends follow her topic sentences directly with a sentence about the group of photos she will use or in some cases, explains the topic sentence further using an inference. As I write, I may take note of how I organize my sentences. Another thing I kept in mind while I type is how detailed I should describe the pictures. I noticed that too much detail would cloud the message unless that detail further adds to the topic. Hopefully, I can further apply these techniques and SOAPSTone to improve my writing further.

SOAPSTone:

In the prior two paragraphs, I tried to cover all aspects of SOAPSTone.
The speaker/photographer (S) is Lauren Greenfield. I did so not only to add credibility, but to also attribute the source of the photos since in America, people value/respect intellectual property.The occasion (O) is obviously girl culture or more specifically, the view that girls should be thin. Without context, the reader would be lost.The audience (A) includes both male and females. I also touch upon their values by mentioning how they may react to the images. I stated the purpose (P) as showing people what girl culture is through photos at the end of the first paragraph I typed. Obviously, almost every (or almost every) action we do has a purpose which guides the reader. The subjects (S) of these two paragraphs are fat girls. For the same reason as the previously mentioned parts of SOAPSTone, every paragraph needs a subject the readers could attach the actions to. Unlike the other parts, I did not directly mention the tone (T) which can be said to be pity and/or caustic. On one hand, when people look at the photos of the unhappy, chubby girls, most will feel some pity. Tone helps the audience understand the author's purpose which is why I hinted at this in the paragraphs.

Critiques:
I commented on Kat's blog and Katie's blog.