Christmas Phrases

From: https://www.flickr.com/photos/travisspencer/8252325149

Today is the last day of English 109 honors. The class was in a festive mood. We made elf names (mine was Twinkle Monkey Buns), peer edited our reflection essays, and did a fun grammar activity. For the grammar activity, we made 5 sentences from the list of Christmas phrases. Here are my phrases:

• Up on the housetop, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
• I'm dreaming of a White Christmas and chestnuts roasting on an open fire.
• It's a marshmallow world; let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!
• Deck the halls because baby, it's cold outside.
• After silent night, I heard the bells on Christmas Day.

I know it may be a bit early, but happy holidays everyone!

Blog 40: A Letter of Encouragement

Wikimedia Commons: "Writing a Letter"

My adventure in Honors English 109 is coming to an end. I will use the skills I learned from this class and apply them to my future classes. In case I do decide to look back at this blog, I use this post to write a letter to myself reminding me and others who are interested in reading to never stop learning even if times get tough.

Dear Michael,

You are probably reading this because you are going through tough times or want to look back at your experiences in Honors English 109. I know that you are prone to be being overly stressed. Do not let this stress impede your progress.

In your chemistry class this semester, remember how the professor used a silly slippery slope analogy to show that everyone is capable of learning? You will not end up being a broke hobo on the street because you had one bad grade. Just because you did not do well in college in your first and second year does not mean that you will never be able to pursue your dreams.

Do not let yourself or anyone bring you down. You must work hard and work with your professors to improve your grade. You have potential. As your high school world history TA said, "You are your own obstacle." The only person you are competing with is yourself. Comparing yourself to others will only exacerbate your stress.

You will be taking a large course load than last semester which can be intimidating, but do not lose hope. Remember to ask for help if you need it. If you are still doing this, then good for you! Learning is a process. if you do not grasp a topic the first time, do not become frustrated.

Do not give up! You will eventually excel.

Sincerely,
Your Former Self
Michael Gee

Blog 39: Letter to Former Self

"Envelope":

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to just go back in time to change mistakes made in the past? Unfortunately that is not possible with the current technology and probably will introduce further complications. For today, I will think of ideas that I can include in a letter to my former self in the beginning of the Fall 2015 semester about writing.

Dear Michael,

College is going to be a different experience than high school. You will find that out soon enough. Do not let this transition intimidate you. Remain calm, seek help when you need it, pay careful attention to assignment details, and do not feel confined to perfecting one draft.

I wish I would have known about the different resources available to help me raise my grade. This not only applies to English, but also applies to other classes, Do not be stubborn. You will find out that opening a paper with generalizations is not as effective as you think. Although it was acceptable in high school, remember, you are writing for different audiences in college. Make sure to understand what your professor wants in a paper.

Also pay careful attention to project requirements. The first English project will be tough if you do not keep in mind what the project is asking. It may seem like a simple guide to a topic, but it is more than that. Every time you write a paper, keep in mind these three things: who is your audience, what is the context/occasion, and what it the purpose?

In addition to paying attention, writing multiple drafts may be helpful. You will find it more stressful and boring to revise the same draft over and over again. Scrap the draft and write something completely different. If you do not know where to start, compose an outline or some other pre-writing activity.

That is all for now. Good luck with English; you will do fine if you do not stress and follow these tips.

Sincerely,
Your Future Self
Michael Gee

Blog 38: Reflective Essay Organizing Idea and Thesis

Crossroads: Which path will my reflection take?
Hmmm...

From my last blog post, I showed interest in writing a reflective essay about a specific assignment, but I will explore other options. Maybe I may change my mind and choose a different route. I will type five thesis statements corresponding to five themes:

Focus on a specific assignment, experience, or concept.

Throughout the revision process for the project two, the #LikeAGirl rhetorical analysis, I learned to be wary of my word choice, organization, and relevance of my ideas through the comments of my English professor, writing center tutors, and my classmates.

Compare your experiences in this course to past experiences.

Honors English 109 is a completely different experience from high school English in terms of the class' expectations. the genres being analyzed, and the different factors to consider in an essay,

Reflect on strengths and weaknesses.

As I became more self aware of my writing skills in Honors English 109, I realized that my strengths lied in formulating ideas and weaknesses lied in organization and word usage.

Focus on course objectives.

One semester of Honors English 109 enhanced my rhetorical awareness, critical thinking, revision skills, and understanding of conventions.

Focus on writing process/self-perception as a writer.

I had a chance to develop certain habits and personalities during my semester in Honors English 109 such as annotating sources, typing multiple drafts, and revising my paper more critically.

...and I choose:

The thesis that I will choose is the one about the specific assignment since it allows me to hone in on a specific assignment and incorporate specific evidence more easily than if I chose a broader topic. I can intertwine comparisons of my essay before and after with my personal experiences through the drafting process.

Feel free to provide feedback. I gave feedback to Alaina Michael's and Cati Krutilla's theses.

Blog 37: Audience and Invention For Reflective Essay

"A Thinking Man"

After reflecting on my experience and growth as a writer this semester in my last blog post, I will narrow those thoughts into a topic for the reflection essay. In this post, I will identify my audience and describe how I will write my essay, taking them into account.

The topic I want to discuss with my readers is my development as a writer throughout the semester. I will most likely delve into the revision process for my second essay about the #LikeAGirl Super Bowl commercial. Although the essay was daunting, I learned so much from the revisions. I want the readers to understand how these revisions, trips to the Think Tank, and input from classmates helped me think more critically about my writing.

In the prior paragraph, I mentioned that my essay is being read, but by who? The primary audience/reader of my reflective essay will be my English professor who will assign a grade for it. My professor is not my only audience. The people who will give feedback on my essay during the revision process will also be included. These people such as classmates and Think Tank tutors will serve as my secondary audience.

Finger pointing:
This assumes that readers of my blog are part of my audience.

So far I have pinpointed my audience. Now I need to analyze what they already know or believe about how to write essays. My professor is already familiar with my writing style and so do most if not all of my classmates through the blog and class workshops. They are also familiar with the how to effectively peer review and look for places in an essay that need to be shortened, clarified, or reorganized since the class stressed those concepts.

Now that I have pinpointed my professor as my primary audience, I need to organize and develop my ideas to reflect my growth as a writer. I will primarily rely on comparison and contrast of my multiple drafts from the rhetorical analysis of #LikeAGirl (subject to change). I will explain how my drafts progressed through the revision process and compare the different drafts using appropriate quotes/sentences from each one.

Next, I will decide how to establish my ethos with my readers. Since I had more than one person review my rhetorical analysis of #LikeAGirl commercial, I can include anecdotal evidence or use comments from credible sources such as my English professor to indicate what part of my rhetorical analysis needed attention. Another possibility is using shared values since everyone in the class had to do the same project. I may also choose to use a friendly tone to open my reflection through specific word choice.

With these ideas in mind, I will be able to narrow the scope of my reflection. In my next blog, we will see how these pieces come together when I compose different thesis statements.

Blog 36: Discovering My Writing Process

"A woman thinking statue"

Today is the first day of December. This college semester in close to ending and that means finals are approaching. For my English class, the final project is a reflection. I am sitting in my dorm wondering what would be the best way to begin this blog. I will start out with a simple question and answer format, exploring my growth as a writer.

What type(s) of writer do you consider yourself to be?

I consider myself a heavy reviser. Drafting and outlining help me plan my writing, but actually composing the draft helps me gauge whether my paper is well written or not. When I wrote my public argument and analysis, I wrote three significantly different drafts for each piece.

Have you changed your process to incorporate approaches from different writer identities?

I also try to incorporate some aspects of the heavy planner and sequential composer. For my last project, I had one document where I compiled all my sources and organized the information from those sources into pro/con categories. Normally, I would not use this strategy, but  found that it greatly helped me develop the main stance I should take for the argument.

In what ways has your approach to writing changed because of a particular assignment, activity, or concept you have learned?

The rhetorical analysis of the #LikeAGirl commercial marked a major change in my writing. I realized that I needed to be more careful about what words I used, how I organized my paper, and how I started my paper (introduction). Now I try not to use overly complex word choice unless it is appropriate. I also break up my paragraphs because I found that I tend to place too many major ideas into one paragraph. As for the introduction, I avoid generalizations and make it more relevant to the topic of the paper.

What does your writing process look like? Has it shifted throughout the course of the semester? Does it change for different writing situations?

Before, I would only compose one draft and heavily edit that draft myself, but throughout the semester, I found that writing multiple drafts helpful. I also had others read my paper and provide feedback. This is especially true for my second and third project. I also used the same strategy for my general education class, but have yet to see the results.

Did you try any new approaches to writing this semester? What worked? What didn't work? What might you try in future writing situations?

I definitely tried new approaches to writing this semester. As indicated by my response to the prior question, I will continue to seek help on my papers when I am unsure. I will also take into account the rhetorical aspects of a written assignment such as audience, message, and occasion. By understanding what my audience (the person grading my paper) expects from me, I am able to write a better paper. The cluster diagram and pre-writing activities helped me brainstorm, but did not help me much during the actual writing process. In the future, I will ask questions and seek help when I am unsure about a paper sooner rather than later. I might also try to actively engage in my writing through the pre-writing activities I learned in class.

Blog 35: Thanksgiving and the Syrian Refugee Crisis Political Cartoon

"Sorry but we're not accepting refugees."
http://imgur.com/gallery/SSh4gAC

Only three more days until Thanksgiving! To start the week off, we have this interesting political cartoon to analyze. Time to roll up my sleeves and analyze.

The political cartoon just recently circulated into social media, during the Syrian refugee crisis. Due to the crisis' proximity to Thanksgiving, alluding to the pilgrims and the Native Americans seems appropriate.

The audience would be the Americans who are oppose Syrian refugees entering the United States. The Thanksgiving theme reinforces the idea that the image is aimed at an American audience.

The message is simply "Sorry but we're not accepting refugees." The author conveys this message using a satirical tone. 

The purpose is to make those opposed to letting in Syrian refugees rethink their view. After looking at the image, the author hopes that the audience will realize that if the Native Americans treated the pilgrims with kindness. We would not be here today if the Native Americans had not accepted the pilgrims (although that point is debatable).

In order to understand the cartoon, readers need a general understanding of the Thanksgiving story, the reason why the pilgrims came to the New World, and knowledge of the Syrian refugee crisis. The pilgrim's voyage on the Mayflower was harsh. Even when the pilgrims reached land, many more died of starvation because they were unfamiliar with the land and came ill prepared for the harsh winter.

If the pilgrims stayed in England, they would be prosecuted due to their religion. That is why they took this arduous journey, for religious freedom.

The author of the cartoon contrasts this with how some Americans are reacting to Syrian refugees. The refugees also fled their homes like the pilgrims, but due to violence. 

After the terrorist attack in France, Americans are justified to think that we should be careful when accepting Syrian refugees, but we also need to extend a helping hand to those who are innocent victims.

Blog 34: Project 3 Rhetorical Analysis Thesis Statement

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First-year_composition#
/media/File:Schreiben_mit_Kugelschreiber.jpg

After spending time to craft my public argument, I now need to analyze it. Here is the thesis for my developing analysis:

The most effective means for persuading middle of the road, educated, American adults that physician assisted suicide should be an end of life option is best achieved through an online news article using anecdotes, brief paragraphs, simple word choice, and contrasts between pros and cons.

Public Argument Venn Diagram

To better identify my target audience for Project 3, I constructed a Venn diagram using readwritethink.org. On a side note, PAS stands for physician assisted suicide, but supporters may refer to it as physician assisted death (PAD) which sounds less violent than the former.

Blog 33: Physician Assisted Suicide Background Research

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Dignity_in_Dying_logo.png

Here is my background research into what different groups have to say about physician assisted suicide - link.

I commented on Benjamin Weiss' outline and Dee Schwartz's outline.

Blog ___: 5 Types of Public Arguments

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/
File:Japanese_Urban_Expwy_Sign_Number_5.svg

After identifying the potential audiences for my public argument, I must now choose how to frame the argument. I will provide a few sentences for each argument type, explaining how I will craft my argument if I choose that type:

Position (pro/con) Argument

Many scientific or even medical magazine articles seem to go with this method, stating the benefits of a certain drug/treatment, but then also acknowledging the drawbacks. I may discuss the pros of physician assisted suicide which appears to revolve around the idea of less suffering and more control over one's life and the cons which are the ethical issues and possible change in how humans see death. At the end of the argument (which may most likely be a brief article in an online magazine/newspaper) I will choose a side.

Causal Argument

For a causal argument, I may argue that people are more inclined to kill themselves because they have lost control of their lives and that legally providing them with the means to do it helps alleviate this fear. Any form of commercial or slideshow is appropriate for this because they serve to sway a larger audience who is not familiar with the topic or does not possess strong views.

Evaluative Argument

Here, I may explore the success of laws that allow physician assisted suicide in other countries or in Oregon where this law was passed. I may need to include statistical data and surveys to evaluate the success of permitting physician assisted suicide. This type of argument works with the scholarly arguments meant to persuade the people who have the power to legalize physician assisted suicide.

Proposal Argument

The proposal argument will take a bit more effort to craft because to support its claims, one must combine different elements. In a way, the proposal is a mix of the other types of arguments. I may include statistics from countries that permit physician assisted suicide, anecdotes from relatives, and may even need to say how the United States healthcare system is not living up to its standards. Using these, I may have to devise a plan to persuade my audience who will most likely be in politics or medicine using that evidence.

Refutation Argument

If I choose this route, I will have to delve into the morals and/or beliefs against physician assisted suicide and disprove them. Pathos may seem to be the best device here in the form of anecdotes where I can choose stories where people suffer because they were denied their request for a suicide. I can also mention the Hippocratic oath and redefine what it means to fit the argument. A refutation seems to be aimed toward a broader audience (same one as causal argument).

After going through all these arguments, I decided to maybe go with the position argument or the refutation argument. Now I shall delve deeper into one of them.

Deeper Look at Refutation Argument

With the refutation argument, I find it more convenient to get my message across through public means such as an online article, YouTube slideshow, website, blog, etc. The audience will be those who do not feel strongly about physician assisted suicides. Most likely this will include people who are age 40+ and most likely middle classed who had a loved one suffer in the hospital. Sound logical reasoning and tapping into the tender emotions of the audience will be the primary ways of conveying the message, but I can also add that I know how it feels to have a loved one suffer which helps me connect with the audience. For the logic, I may try to debunk any misconceptions that arise from this such as the idea that this promotes suicide. That is why controls must be put in place to prevent people who are emotionally unstable from ending their lives. The emotion I'm would be trying to elicit is pity.

Blog 32: Initial Thoughts about Audience for My Argument

The audience.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audience#/media/File:Audience_Frontier_Fiesta.jpg

With the internet easing the dissemination of information among various population groups, one may be tempted to say that a a general audience does exist, but that is not the case. My English professor helped the class realize this. Although many people can access this information granted that they have computers, smartphones, smart watches, and/or tablets, the information put online is meant to reach a certain audience. Each person has certain interests or niches in society. Not everyone is going to read every single piece of information put online. They only read what they find interesting or relevant to them. That is why humans use google and other search engines. Keeping this in mind, authors craft their arguments in certain ways to appeal to those who will care about their topics. 

As for my public argument concerning physician assisted suicides, I can choose to gear my topic toward one of the different audiences. On one side, are the "average Joe's", those who have experience in healthcare whether it is personally or through a family member. The age group for this ranges, but usually includes adults who most likely have attended college.

On the other side are the people who actually have a say in medical practices such as people on the medical board and the government. These groups are composed of men and women who are well educated and usually experts on the topic or at least know the politics behind it. Maybe just ending one's life instead of placing him/her on a machine for several years saves money (which may be appealing to some, but seems unethical).

The members of a medical board will be much more knowledgeable with the fine details in physician assisted suicides, but the "average Joe's" might not. The middle to upper-class American adult may be familiar with the concept, but never had any deep thoughts about it.

Many other people may also encounter this argument such as ethicists, religious populations, actual doctors/nurses, and the elderly people. Among these the ethicists and religious populations will be most hostile. Suicide is a sin, but allowing a suffering patient to live does not seem ethical. Most likely if this is implemented, strict regulations must to put in place to determine whether a person is eligible for physician assisted suicide.

To understand the argument, the audience needs to understand how much suffering a chronic patient endures, statistics from other countries that adopted this method, and the possible controls if it is approved.

Blog 31: My Proposed Public Argument

This looks intimidating.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_unproven_and_disproven_cancer
_treatments#/media/File:Injection_Syringe_01.jpg

The time has come to start thinking about assignment 3, the public argument. After scrolling through a list of possible options, I begin to consider doing something in the scholarly argument or public argument. If I go toward the scholarly route, I may do a brief editorial or maybe even a scientific literature review. If I go toward the public argument route, I may consider a typed magazine article or even a Wikipedia article.

The topic will be something related to the medical field that is controversial or at least is argumentative in nature. Perhaps I can create an argument over physician assisted suicide or euthanasia (which are 2 different things). Although not necessarily science related, it does relate to the medical field.

The purpose of the rhetorical situation would be to persuade the American Medical Association and any other major medical group that has a say in terms of medical practices that using drugs to kill patients who want to die is ethical. I can also take a public approach by influencing people that this should be an acceptable option hoping that the message is widespread enough to lead to action by the more influential people (president, governor, chairs of hospitals, etc.).

Blog 30: Analysis of "Letter to the Honorable Janice Brewer"

A picture of former Arizona Governor Janice Brewer.
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/f1/Jan_Brewer.jpg/506px-Jan_Brewer.jpg

Tone of Letter

Kassandra tries to convey a formal and respectful tone in her letter to Governor Jan Brewer, the governor of Arizona. The governor is very busy and does not free much free time to read every letter that people send to her. Governor Brewer probably has an intern or employee reviewing her letters organizing them into piles by importance. In order to have her letter noticed, Kassandra must sound like a reasonable person which is where the respectful and formal tones come into play. Kassandra acknowledges some of Governor Brewer's points with phrases such as "I understand...", "As you have rightly pointed out...", and "as you have endorsed before". She also thanks the governor. The technique help the reader see Kassandra's letter appear serious and genuine. If Kassandra denounces Governor Brewer, the governor may never get to see the letter or even pay attention to it.

Conventions of Genre

The letter follows the format of a business letter. A shift in paragraph is not indicated by an indent, but a space. Kassandra seems to avoid contractions and abbreviations with the only exception being the AHCCCS in parenthesis. The paragraphs seem to have only a few sentences with the maximum number in one paragraph being six. The letter begins with an introduction of the writer and ends with a thank you where the author offers her contact information. Because the formatting is formal, the genre is suitable for Kassandra's argument.

Ethos

Kassandra establishes her ethos in the introductory paragraph and at the end where she says "sincerely" then her name. She also adds to her ethos by acknowledging Governor Brewer's ideas and previous statements. When Kassandra introduces herself as a student at the University of Arizona, she does not effectively increase her credibility. The fact that she is a student makes her appear educated, but it does not mean that she is necessarily knowledgeable about healthcare budget cuts. Her next attempt to establish ethos at the closing does not contribute much to her ethos either. Being a student in the College of Science is commendable, but again is not relevant to the argument. Kassandra does a better job of establishing her credibility by acknowledging Governor Jan Brewer's views. Doing so shows that Kassandra did her research.

Overall Claim

Kassandra's overall claim is that the governor should not cut $1 billion from Medicaid. She provides a brief overview of the negative effects of cutting spending and then proposes three alternatives that would reduce Medicaid costs. She includes several relevant statistics such as "Cutting the state budget will cause...250,000 people to lose coverage". The rest of her argument is based off of logical proposals which can be questionable since they are not supported by research or surveys.

Call-to-Action

Kassandra wants the governor to prevent the $1 billion budget cut and instead consider her alternatives to replace the cuts. She goes into some detail, but not enough to give the governor or the governor's employee a clear idea of how to implement these proposals. On the other hand, the vague proposals may allow the governor flexibility if Governor Brewer wants to use Kassandra's ideas. Overall, it is clear that Kassandra wants Governor Brewer to stop the Medicaid budget cut.

Suggestions

Kassandra could have made a separate paragraph for her first approach to make it more evident. She combines the money saved from the budget cuts with her first proposal of "setting a spending limit" into one paragraph. She makes her first proposal difficult to notice. Her transitions are also rough in some parts of the letter. One example of this is near the end of her second paragraph: "These cuts target the most vulnerable population: the disabled, the elderly, and the needy. Another area of concern is the effect of the budget cuts on Medicaid hospitals." The paragraph ends there. The abrupt change in subjects with no elaboration on the "effect of...cuts on...hospitals" does not serve much of a purpose other than to bring up another point. Kassandra may want to either take out that last sentence or elaborate on it.

Overall, Kassandra's approach to the public argument is not perfect, but lies somewhere above satisfactory. She is able to convey her point in a concise and straightforward manner, but could edit her letter more to be more specific and smooth.

After reading this, I have somewhat of an idea of what I want to write about in my public argument.

Blog 29: Reflection of Rhetorical Analysis

A reflection of a kitten. Perhaps I am trying to appeal to pathos...
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Kitten_and_partial_reflection_in_mirror.jpg

Now that I am done with the rhetorical analysis, I sit back and reflect on the experience. Overall, this experience is in a way an eye opener for me. I learned how to seek help on my writing via the Writing Center and learned what my English professor expects in my papers. After this experience, I will try to be cautious about how I craft my papers and apply what I learned to my other classes.

From this rhetorical analysis assignment, I learned much about my writing process such as areas where I need to be more conscientious and how to manage my time better. I learned that I should be more aware of the connotations words have before applying them and to avoid overly generalized introduction paragraphs. That does not mean I will not use such words from time to time, but I will try to use them carefully. I somewhat improved my time management, but in the process put too much pressure on myself. As a result, this paper proved to be emotionally taxing.

I am sure that this paper should be better than the controversy analysis. I made sure that all my topic sentences connected to the topic sentence and that the body paragraphs support that topic. I even had two tutors (from the Writing Center) confirm this, but I still doubt myself sometimes.

The thing I find interesting about English classes is the fact that the lessons learned from class can be applied almost everywhere. I have an essay coming up for one of my courses and hope to apply what I learned about organization and clarity to that paper. The clarity section may also be useful for my future and current lab reports. As I write those, I will pay closer attention to my organization.

Overall, I enjoyed the learning experience, but did not enjoy the stress associated with it. I will find ways to de-stress myself and try to find the balance between too much pressure and too little pressure. For now, I should anticipate the future keeping in mind that the skills that I learned from this essay such as clarity, organization, and word choice.

I commented on Gabi Dodsen's refelction, Kati Krutilla's reflection, and Laura Shoemake's reflection.

Blog 28: #LikeAGirl Link to Draft

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Simple_Comments.svg

Here is a the link to my most up to date rough draft.

Feel free to comment on this. I am open to any suggestions.

I gave what I hope to be helpful criticism to Dee Schwartz's rough draft and Lekha Chesnick's rough draft.

Feedback Experience

I have tried to obtain feedback from several sources. This Tuesday, I tried the Think Tank's online writing tutoring. That was alright, but not as helpful since I prefer to discuss questions in person, but they are certainly good for those who prefer to work on papers from the comfort of his/her dorm, house, etc. Through the online sessions I was able to revise my introduction and thesis statement.

Today, I went to a walk-in session at the writing center. In those 15 minutes, I was able to accomplish much more than the online session. The tutor said that my topic sentences connected to the thesis which was good and that my paper flowed nicely. She suggested that for the part of the paper where I mention the tone shift, I should include a topic sentence that discusses how and why Always uses tone shifts to establish a stronger connection to the thesis. She also said that my conclusion can be adjusted so that the reader is left with something to contemplate and so that it is not too wordy. I plan to follow her advice and revise my conclusion also checking for other other mistakes that we did not catch.

All in all, this was a new experience for me. By reviewing my paper with others, I sometimes feel reassured and often catch mistakes that I would not necessarily be able to catch if I read the paper myself. Despite this, there is still some doubt as to whether my paper is good enough.

Proof that I actually attended the Think Tank session.
I asked the tutor for permission to post this and she gave her approval.

Blog 27 #LikeAGirl Analysis Thesis and Outline

https://www.flickr.com/photos/nenyaki/2430528033

Thesis Statement: During the Superbowl 2015, Always has Lauren Greenfield commercial concerning their adolescent female empowering movement called #LikeAGirl which attempts to redefine the meaning of the phrase “like a girl” to her predominantly male audience at that time, but the campaign finds a niche in YouTube and other internet popular media sources further expanding its audience to include the females of all ages and different ethnicities. Always uses powerful imagery, shifts in tone from mild to intense, and simplicity in crafting its commercial to quite effectively convey its altruistic message.

I critiqued Arrick Benson's, Kian Blackey's, and Dee Schwartz's thesis and outline blogs.

Here is the link to the overview: https://docs.google.com/a/email.arizona.edu/document/d/1rc4Hy6ON_OjSN5InCznhVAfHCSqgzL8mFVAyhtLbC9Q/edit?usp=sharing

Blog 26 Prewriting Activities: #LikeAGirl

https://pixabay.com/en/idea-invention-inventor-thinking-152213/

For this assignment, I decided to do do an observations and inferences chart, a more clear cut SOAPSTone, and free-writing. The SOAPSTone will help me create a brief outline from which I can expand my ideas further in the form of an observations and inferences chart. The problem is that sometimes I may run out of ideas to place into the chart which is where the free-writing comes into play. By typing out all my ideas, I could pick and choose which ones fit the chart and add them. Free-writing is like brainstorming. All these activities help facilitate each other which is why I chose these methods.

Here is the link to the pre-writing activity:  https://docs.google.com/a/email.arizona.edu/document/d/1hGK1ammm8fp6lgb95cL-I1chx2tCdLsVoHKV03FlXYs/edit?usp=sharing
It may still need to undergo some revisions.

I commented on Laura Shoemake's blog and Gabi Dodson's blog.

Blog 25 Personal Response: #LikeAGirl

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminism

One may find it peculiar that a male should analyze a commercial about feminine hygiene products. One stereotypical thought that may come to the minds of ordinary people is "What do men know about women?" Well, let me answer that. The knowledge men have about women varies from male to male. I do have some prior knowledge of the physiological processes and organs of a female (thanks to my health and biology courses), but beyond that, my knowledge is rather limited. Analyzing a piece of rhetoric allows me to delve deeper into the social/cultural aspects surrounding females and further practice my writing skills.

After watching Always' #LikeAGirl commercial, I realized how stereotypical comments even if used in a jocular manner, shape how humans perceive each other especially how they see females. Nowadays, more people see the phrase "like a girl" as immature. It is something that a 9 year old might say, but the images it provokes still linger's in the heads of the older generations. The background of the commercial also piques my interest since a plain stage provides a stark contrast to the fabricated sets used in other commercials. As I watched the first half of the commercial, I thought "Girls don't run like that. They (most girls) don't even fight like that." The business aspect of the commercial is interesting too. Always is trying to advertise their product, but does not auspiciously show it like other commercials. Instead, Always creates a female empowering clip. I personally see females as being biologically the stronger sex compared to men in terms of genetically and life-span-wise, but did not fully realized that stereotypical slurs can define a culture or society.

I commented on Michael Burger's blog and Alaina Michaels' blog.

Blog 24: Outline Student's Guide Essay

Since this essay is about sex-trafficking, this picture seems apropos.
https://www.flickr.com/photos/iragelb/5611594783

A copy of the outline can be found here: https://docs.google.com/a/email.arizona.edu/document/d/1RpjjARg6wx45M_r0S6T2TilAxdB6dPcCgVsjTeKcVl0/edit?usp=sharing

Wanted: Emotional Response for the End of Sex-Trafficking

By Mikayla Gerdes-Morgan

Outline

1. Introduction

1. Shocking statistic to set scope of problem
2. Comparison to slave trade

1. Exploitation of women
2. Women as commodity

C. Documentary film

1. What is sex-trafficking
2. How it affects slaves

D. Thesis: “Through the use of reenactments and cinematography, Nolot effectively illustrates the dire need for the cessation of human sex-trafficking and appeals to his viewers’ emotions.”

E. Purpose

1. Catches reader’s attention
2. Provides transition into rest of paper

II. Dramatized reenactments to show how sex traffickers dehumanize females when buying them

1. Girl’s walking down runway

1. Watched by sex traffickers
2. Fashion show meant to sell clothes not women’s bodies
3. Shocks audience

2. Metaphor to show dehumanization

1. Victims treated worse than dogs
2. Comparison to dogs belittle victims
3. Victims are commodities
4. Depicts hypocrisy of sex-trafficking

C. Purpose

1. Hopes to elicit enough empathy from audience by showing how this is not humane

III. Commentary from expert on topic

1. Melissa Farley

1. Clinical psychologist
2. Director for Prostitution Research and Education

2. Insight on victims desperate situations

1. Victim obeys commands of trafficker

1. Allows trafficker full control

3. Appeals to emotion

1. Victims shown as lesser beings than dogs

D. Purpose

1. Provide insight from a credible expert to support her claim

IV. Cinematographic effects appeals to emotion and furthers power complex

1. Discussion with psychologist

1. Power over individual forces individual to disconnect from world
2. Recede into self, open to control from others

2. Image of man beating woman

1. Angle from victim’s perspective
2. Viewing window decreases in size

1. Reflects dwindling soul
2. Appeals emotionally

i. Allows readers to connect at personal level

ii. Places viewers in victim’s shoes

C. Purpose

1. Elicits pity from audience compelling them to free the victims

V. Narrowing circle metaphor for tunnel

1. Victim’s account of broken emotional outlook

1. Mindset like tunnel

2. Girl leaning against bed, crying

1. Screen’s field narrows, honing in
2. Girl becomes more distant
3. Hope to escape diminishes

3. Prospective earning from prostitution is a mirage

1. Circle border/tunnel fades to blackness
2. Loss of hope
3. Places viewers in victim’s situation

D. Camera angle from above

1. Victim in lower position
2. Appeals to empathy
3. Compels readers to want to pull her out of her situation

E. Purpose

1. Showing victims are helpless
2. Only the audience can do something to save victims

VI. Brazenness creates empathetic response

1. Exposing audience to victim’s situation

1. Provokes audience to take action to help victims
2. Reasoning and importance of helping them

2. Victims deserve a second chance

1. Humanizes victims

3. Justification to end sex-trafficking
4. Society must take action
5. Visual appeals

1. Humans must come together to end sex-trafficking
2. Free the victims

F. Purpose

1. Concludes the paper hoping to rally support against sex-trafficking

Analyzing the Analysis

Mikayla organizes her essay in an understandable way. The topics of the sentences flowed well going from how these sex-trafficking victims are dehumanized to how this belittles their view of themselves to how society or the readers could change this which follows her thesis. Her transitions at the end of paragraphs often mention that the ideas explored in the paragraph serves to make the audience want to take action. These concluding sentences may reiterate the purpose, but sacrifices its smoothness. She also seems to organize her paragraphs by providing evidence (mostly paraphrases) then following her evidence with an analysis which seems logical.

One of her stronger paragraphs is the paragraph that talks about the narrowing circular frame. She goes beyond the images to create her own opinions of what this symbolizes and how it influences the audience to take action by revealing how sex-trafficking locks its victims into a set mindset where any chance of hope is slipping away as these victims reach a harsh realization. Mikayla analyzes how the frame creates and represents this effect pretty well.

One of Mikayla's weaker paragraphs is the third one where she talks about the desperate situations of the victims of sex-trafficking. The information and evidence used meshed together with the second half of the second paragraph which makes this paragraph somewhat redundant. I would take the paragraph out or rewrite it so as to mention more than just what is said, but include the tone used. I may also consider rewriting the analysis so that it does not repeat the idea that women are made lesser beings.

Blog 23: HONY Observation/Inferences Chart

Observations	Inferences
Speaker: Brandon Stanton, a photographer young risk-taker, spontaneous takes portraits and talks with his subjects sometimes takes pictures without face	Has traits of an artist Interested in both physical appearance and personality He respects each person’s preferences
Occassion: Tumblr blog, Facebook, and book	Online social media tends to publicize information to a wide range of people. Allows open discussion about photographs.
Audience: anyone who has Facebook or Tumblr	The reactions to the pictures are overall positive. Commenters sympathize with the pictures or support the stories. May raise interesting discussions from diverse viewpoints.
Purpose: Take pictures that make him and his audience happy	He connects on a personal level with his audience. Wants to make people aware of different stories Change how humans see life/places
Subject(s): People who are oftentimes overlooked What Stanton considers beautiful, cute, or interesting Regular “street people” People posing	Whether or not something is beautiful is a matter of perception. View the overlooked people from a new angle. People can relate to their experiences.
Tone: varies among photographs Pitiful Humorous Heartwarming	Each subject has different stories/personalities leading to these nuances Different tones catch audience’s attention (breaks monotony)

The aspects of Humans of New York that fascinate me are the clothes the people wear, the backgrounds of the photographs, and the short stories/captions on the bottom of each one.  The diversity of styles, locations, and records of their personal accounts/statements somehow catches my attention. If I am to write a rhetorical analysis about HONY, perhaps I may analyze the relationship between the photos and the stories or explore how the photographer, Brandon Stanton uses the different mediums to appeal to his huge fan base on social media.